Pages

Tuesday 14 May 2013

Day 14

Photo a Day in May Challege Day 14

Need

This has been going round my head all day - and I have had so many trite thoughts about what I need: Various sewing machines (obvious), Children (ditto), To clean my sewing machines (had a malfunction - took the cleaning brush to all 3 and had an embarassingly large pile of fluff that I couldnt quite bring myself to photograph), Sleep (really bad few nights - but wasnt sure whether to just take photo of my haggard face?!), Time, etc (you get the idea)

Its been a rough day - I have felt pulled in all directions, almost all of my own making, and it has come to this. 

What I really need is Balance!


I am trying desperately to keep my business moving forwards - and it feels at times like I am getting somewhere, but in order to keep it moving, I spend every evening on the computer uploading, marketing, networking and so on, and then I spend very little time with Iain. I spend all day sewing, without really taking a break which means that by the time I pick the children up from school I am grumpy, hungry and have a headache, so they get the worst of me. Lucas has medical appointments and admissions coming up, and I am getting stressed working out how to fit work around them, when really he should have all of my time. Isla has an operation on Thursday, so will need my undivided attention for a few days - in which case Lucas, Iain and work suffers. I literally have no idea how to create balance. I know its possible, and I know the sewing thing is my decision - I am doing it because I want a role, a purpose, and because we need money, but I wonder almost every day what I should be doing differently to make things work better for me in my roles.  No one gets the best of me right now, not even myself. I am often on the verge or tears or screaming, and there is no reason for that except that I cannot create this balance that I so desperately need!

Love Sarah


4 comments:

  1. Sarah, I wish could say the right thing here. I hope that sometime soon you can find some time for yourself. You need to re-energize, and you will not be able to do that if you are emptying yourself out without refueling. Sewing is my therapy, but if I made it my work I might not enjoy it as much. You have a heavy cart to pull; maybe you need to give yourself a break. God bless you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's a similar situation for most small businesses I think because times are tough and you need to work at your business 24/7. I think, for me, the most important thing is to continue to enjoy what I do and focus on each piece/item of work and let the rest follow. If you beat yourself up and feel stressed all the time it somehow prevents you moving forward. Focus on the moment and not the future maybe...it doesn't solve the issues but it means you can cope with them I think XX

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks you Marcia, I wonder too about keeping it as a hobby, but then I would need to look for employment elsewhere, I fear?!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sue - that is a really wise suggestion, thankyou!

    ReplyDelete

I always love hearing from you!
Love Sarah